So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I have tasted many bathrooms
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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