she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
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