I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I have tasted many bathrooms
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
