you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Randomize
