You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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