I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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