Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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