We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
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