Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
