i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
