I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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