my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
My bed smells like the plague
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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