we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
