I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
