im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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