I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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