So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize
