omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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