Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
