I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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