The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Randomize