therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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