I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
