No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
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