Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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