Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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