No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize