Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
