I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
is this the sara with the beer cane?
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
