I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
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