He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
