two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
