I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
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