i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
