dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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