Dual....:-)
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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