i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
