Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize