kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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