you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
where are my eyebrows?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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