remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Randomize