Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
