just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
