Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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