are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
You've changed since you got that strap on
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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