yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
