its not stalking. its research.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
