Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Randomize
