hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
