i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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