How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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