Your dad touched me again.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
