The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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