I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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